the brilliantly leaping gazelle

There are many things to be written about the arrest of Graham Linehan and most of them have already been written by people far more eloquent than me. That being the case though – and not diminishing their strident defence of him one bit – they all do seem to be writing different versions of the same thing. 

A chilling clampdown on free speech, check. A massive misuse of police resources, check. Indicative of how grievance is being weaponised, check. An illustration of how the rights of a minority of a minority are being prioritised above the rights of the majority, check. More proof of the ideological hijacking of our politics, check. Etc, etc.

All of these things are true. They need to be said. But the problem is that partly the people saying them are precisely the people one would expect to say them – J.K. Rowling, Elon Musk, Ken Loach and Juliet Stevenson, among others. Another is that various news outlets giving them the space to express these opinion are precisely the ones that one might be expected to.

Only joking. Can you really imagine Ken, Juliet and others who like them are who always demanding that the government do this, but stop doing that or else calling for a boycott of the other, firing off an angry letter to ‘The Guardian’ expressing their solidarity with him? They had no problem doing so earlier this year they did so for trans people. But then I suppose that long gone are the days when the Voltaire principle – “ I may not agree with your point of view, but I defend your right to say it.” – could be deployed, robustly defended as a matter of principle and respected by all.

But my main problem with all the condemnation though is that no-one taking the piss. Everyone is taking it  far more seriously than it deserves. Which is ironic, given as how Linehan wrote “Father Ted” and some of the funniest sitcoms ever on British TV. They say that by exposing something harmful to a bright light, the lighter the light, the more it disinfects. But equally, why not laughter? 

The whole “trans-women are women” nonsense deserves to be ridiculed. It’s so blatantly absurd that it’s difficult not laugh at it and that it’s proponents should be roundly mocked for being the gullible idiots they are. Businesses who loudly proclaim their support for this trumpery moonshine should be engulfed by protests, more reminiscent of student rag weeks or immersive street theatre. The newly elected leader of The Green Party, Mr Booby, could use his hypnotic powers to help trans women to get their breast to grow. Men could march across the UK with them all sporting full beards and with their cocks out whilst chanting “We’re women and demand to be heard/ don’t tell us we’re absurd.” Women could do the same, but instead wear 1970’s style caked on make up whilst brandishing massive dildo’s like spears. Elderly men could join the Girl Guides and elderly women the Cubs.

After all the whole trans thing is taking the piss, why shouldn’t we take the piss out of it? Instead of which, everyone is taking it seriously.  Which of course, they should. But at the same time, they  shouldn’t.