the brilliantly leaping gazelle

I’ve read the Brexit party’s contract with the people, so called, because,

The old mainstream parties have made ‘manifesto’ a dirty word. Everybody knows that a manifesto is little more than a set of vague promises that its authors have no intention of keeping.

I think everyone with an I.Q larger than the radius of their kneecap can see the see that that.

And secondly, the contract, is, it pains me to admit it, a model of clarity, both in terms what it says and also how it is presented. Certainly it is a refreshingly easy read. If all of the manifesto’s published thus far were slimmer’s, then the Liberal Democrat and Labour one’s would be the before ‘photo’s and the Brexit party the after one’s. It says to voters ‘We’re different, we’re not tired, we’re dynamic and forward thinking and that’s why we want to make Britain great again. ‘

And up to a point one thinks ‘Yean, it all makes sense, it all seems fair and reasonable.” But then, rather like ‘those pesky meddling kids’ who thwarted the light-house keepers evil plan in ‘Scooby-Do’, you start wondering where on earth have those pesky little details gone? You know, the one’s that give a little substance to these bold claims. For example, they say they’ll

Phase out the BBC licence fee.

And replace it with what? A subscription model of some kind? Adverts? One is left wondering. And there’s more. A lot more detail free playing to the crowd bullshit. They want to,

Invest in our High Streets: alongside our reforms to Corporation Tax, we will replace business rates with a simpler system to assist small High Street retailers and leisure operators outside the M25, with any reductions funded by an online sales tax.

No-one can possibly disagree with investing in our High Streets! Apart that is, from the countless consumers who’d rather spend their hard-earned money to buy more, for less, online. Ah, an online sales tax, you say? That’ll work! Because the big online retailers like Amazon and eBay, not only are they more than happy to disclose how much profit they make in the UK, they want to pay tax! This has been well documented, both in the press and parliament.

There’s more detail free promises, like,

Invest in the NHS and Social Care: we need to keep investing in these essential and treasured public services — with more medical staff and less waste.

Well we can all agree with that. But read on a few pages further and you’ll find this,

We need to develop a National Health Service fit for the 21st Century. The Brexit Party believes in continued investment in the NHS, better management, increasing the number of medical staff and cutting waste. We want the NHS to be a beacon of excellent care. It was the Labour governments of Blair and Brown that burdened the NHS with billions of pounds of debt through their Private Finance Initiatives.

Mmm. Details, schemtails! Yes Blair and Brown did introduce P.F.I, into the N.H.S, no-one denies this, but it was and has been massively increased and aggressively pursued by successive ideologically driven free market Conservative governments.

The NHS must remain a publically-owned, comprehensive service that is free at the point of use. Your postcode should not determine your care or health.

Again, nothing contentious here. All good, yes? Er, no!

There should be no privatisation of the NHS; where existing private initiatives have failed to deliver we will return them to public ownership.

No one has ever mentioned the privatisaiton of the NHS. What is a concern though is the increasing tendency of NHS. Trusts being forced to sell off lucrative services to private providers. So yes, whilst,

The NHS must remain a publically-owned, comprehensive service that is free at the point of use.

It’s the lack of any detail of what they mean by privatisation. It’s not clear how all – not just some – of these services that the NHS currently provides will be paid for, who is going to be paid and how so called ‘Cinderella’ services – the not money-making one’s, the un-glamouress services most of use – be funded? Fine and everything if they’re ‘free at the point of use’ but if taxpayers money is boosting the profits of private companies, that money that could be put to greater use if it were re-invested in the NHS.

I was going to stop there, but then I spotted this promise of theirs to,

Introduce 24-hour GP surgeries to relieve the strain in A&E departments.

You mean they’re going to re-negotiate GP contracts? Does the trouble Jeremy Hunt had with junior doctors not ring any large fucking bells? That would be a walk in the park compared to incurring the wrath of a workforce whose members are already leaving in large numbers. And who would want to visit their GP at 2am?

I know I’m nit picking but it’s their fault, simplifying it and all, making it so easy to read and find fault with. What did they expect?

There are a lot of faults to be found and I haven’t finished finding them yet…